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Archive for the ‘Rambling’ Category

I’m on the cusp of Christmas break and that means I might finally finish The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (not to be confused with the picture above which merely features a girl with a dragon tattoo). A friend of mine was reading the series a few months ago and said she liked it. When I went to Costco later that week, there were about 1,144 copies of it sitting on a table so I picked on up. It’s pretty interesting, it’s just that I haven’t had any kind of real free time to keep it going. I’ve actually gone weeks between reading and I’m having a hell of a hard time keeping up with characters because of it. Well, that and they have foreign names and since the Rosetta Stone kiosk at Ala Moana closed, I guess I’m shit out of luck.

God willing, I’ll be able to finally knock out the first book, then go get the second one (still lying on a table at Costco) at some point in the next two weeks. I’m 200 pages in and I’ve yet to read anything about a dragon tattoo. Part of me is beginning to feel like it was just a clever title and perhaps the “dragon tattoo” is really just a metaphor for the kind of intrigue and ambiguity surrounding tales of this ilk. The only other girl I know that has/had a dragon tattoo is Angelina Jolie, and I don’t want to read a book about her unless it’s a picture book and there is actually very minimal text. Perhaps captions of the pictures that read “Angelina Jolie totes around a vial of Billy Bob Thornton’s blood at her movie premiere.” I can deal with that.

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1. In the memo field of all your checks, write “for sensual massage.”
2. Speak only in a “robot” voice.
3. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
4. Reply to everything someone says with “that’s what YOU think.”
5. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
6. Practice making fax and modem noises. It’s a real hoot at a party!
7. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
8. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
9. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.
10. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
11. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: “Do you hear that?” “What?” “Never mind, its gone now.”
12. Construct elaborate “crop circles” in your front lawn.
13. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
14. Invite lots of people to other people’s parties.
15. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

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